Thursday, June 30, 2016
Who's Life is it Anyway
My last link got so much interest from my followers, that I figured I'd use another one. I used to watch this show called Who's Line is it Anyway. It's basically an improv comedy show, you can check out the link if you want to get an idea about the show, but it's really not that important, I just wanted you to know where the play on words came from for the title of this post.
I think when we are younger we often get wrapped up in trying to live a life that allows us to fit in, or sometimes we live a life that has us standing out, in an effort to get the attention of others. Sometimes we look around, and see what everyone else is doing, and make decisions just like everyone else. I think we do this for many reasons.
-It's safe. You know, when you are in middle school, or high school, or even as an adult, it's safe and comfortable to take a look at the crowd, and just kind of blend in or fit in. If you do this, there is less risk of looking stupid, being made fun of, or standing out. And, if things don't work out, then you don't feel as bad, because you'll probably have company, or you can play the, "that's life".
-It's easy. If your decision making process involves following the crowd, then you don't really have to process decisions.
-We are unsure of ourselves. Sometimes, we just aren't sure what we want, or who we want to be. So, we look around, see the popular girl, or guy, or the successful, wealthy family next door, and we make decisions based on what we think we would like to be, in the absence of any real direction.
-We don't have any foundation to pull from, no anchor for our soul. Regardless of your spiritual/religious beliefs, we all need to develop some type of moral compass, core values, or foundation that we can draw from when we are making decisions. When we are younger, this area is not always fully developed, or firmly entrenched, and when we are older, we often stray from these beliefs in order to satisfy or most immediate desires.
-"That's just what you do" This is my favorite, or least favorite. Question: What do you do when you graduate high school? False. (just kidding, Schrute) You go to college, right? Why, because that's just what you do. What happens when you graduate college? You get a job. Then you buy lots of stuff with all the new money you are making, then you get a credit card to buy things that you can't afford right now, but that you can pay for later because you have a job. Then you buy a house, get married have children, get a dog, buy a bigger house, work more hours, etc. etc. Then you wake up one day and realize that you don't like your job, your house costs more than you want to pay, you hate picking up your dog's poop, and you don't really like your kids.
Just a joke...for some of it. But the point is this:
There is no blueprint. There is no road map. And everybody is different. You don't have to chase the dreams of your parents, or do something because, "that's what people do". One of my former players, P, once told me, "Coach, you're the real MVP". Now, I'm nowhere near cool enough to know what that means, and I would be ridiculed by my girls if any of them actually read this. But how about this, "YOU'RE the real MVP". That doesn't mean be selfish, or arrogant. But it's your life, and it doesn't belong to anyone else. You need people in your life to support and encourage you, and you need some type of core values/spiritual ancor/belief system to draw from. But, you are the most valuable player in your life. You don't have to talk, walk, dress, date, interact, or live like everyone else. It's you that matters here. What do YOU want to achieve? Who do YOU want to be? Where do YOU want to go. What do YOU want YOUR life to look like?
Who's life is it anyway?